Food In Real Life

Jimmy Dean Scrambled Eggs with Bacon and Cheese

Looks: Small differences: the eggs are not so cheesy in real life, and the apples lack any sort of sauce or extra moisture. If you squint, the two pictures look pretty much the same. 4 out of 5

Taste: Good, and good for you!

Just kidding. The eggs were dry and uncheesy; the potatoes were rubbery and tasteless. The sad little apple pieces were actually the best part of this meal, but that's not saying much at all. Nothing tasted terrible, and if I was in a hurry and really needed to get my cholesterol levels up, this would be an ok choice. Other than that exact situation, I can't see ever eating this again. 1.5 out of 5

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Healthy Choice Bacon & Smokey Cheddar Chicken

Looks: You'd be forgiven for wondering why I took a picture of this meal after I chewed it and spit it back out, but hold onto your butts: that's what it actually looks like immediately after cooking. The vegetables still look frozen, and the chicken and rice mixture is pale, mushy, and completely unappetizing. 1 out of 5

Taste: Worse than it looks. The vegetables were flavorless, and while the chicken and rice had a flavor, it wasn't one I'd like to taste again anytime soon - bitter, oily, gritty, disgusting: much like my last foray into microwave chicken and rice. 0 out of 5

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Oscar Mayer Fully Cooked Bacon

Looks: It's boring to write about foods that look just like their packaging. I bet it's boring to read about too, isn't it? 5 out of 5

Taste: Eaten alone, it's obvious that this bacon was not freshly cooked on a sizzling griddle: it's kind of rubbery and pretty salty. But if you overcook it a little in order to crumble it over baked potatoes, a thick chowder, or a late-evening Pop-Tart, you won't be able to tell the difference between this and "real" bacon. 3.5 out of 5

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