Archive for the ‘Bacon’ Category

Healthy Choice Bacon & Smokey Cheddar Chicken

Thursday, January 21st, 2010

Healthy Choice Bacon & Smokey Cheddar Chicken - Ad

Healthy Choice Bacon & Smokey Cheddar Chicken

Looks: You’d be forgiven for wondering why I took a picture of this meal after I chewed it and spit it back out, but hold onto your butts: that’s what it actually looks like immediately after cooking. The vegetables still look frozen, and the chicken and rice mixture is pale, mushy, and completely unappetizing. 1 out of 5

Taste: Worse than it looks. The vegetables were flavorless, and while the chicken and rice had a flavor, it wasn’t one I’d like to taste again anytime soon – bitter, oily, gritty, disgusting: much like my last foray into microwave chicken and rice. 0 out of 5

Oscar Mayer Fully Cooked Bacon

Thursday, December 3rd, 2009

Oscar Meyer Fully Cooked Bacon - Ad

Oscar Meyer Fully Cooked Bacon

Looks: It’s boring to write about foods that look just like their packaging. I bet it’s boring to read about too, isn’t it? 5 out of 5

Taste: Eaten alone, it’s obvious that this bacon was not freshly cooked on a sizzling griddle: it’s kind of rubbery and pretty salty. But if you overcook it a little in order to crumble it over baked potatoes, a thick chowder, or a late-evening Pop-Tart, you won’t be able to tell the difference between this and “real” bacon. 3.5 out of 5

McDonald’s Premium Ranch BLT Chicken Sandwich

Friday, November 27th, 2009

McDonald's Premium Chicken Sandwich - Ad

McDonald's Premium Chicken Sandwich

Looks: This picture was taken in a rush, so it’s not at the correct angle or anything, but I assure you it’s not too far off from the box. (Also, the box only depicts the standard chicken sandwich; this one had bacon added to it.) The bun is reasonably similar, and from seeing it in real life, I know that the chicken wasn’t significantly different from the packaging. 4 out of 5

Taste: Good, but not great. The chicken was juicy (which is more than I can say for the Angus burger purchased at the same visit), and the bun was nice and chewy. Neither had too much flavor, but the addition of “bacon” helped that a little bit. I’d probably buy it again, but it wouldn’t be my first choice. (For what it’s worth, my wife, whose favorite foods include chicken and bread, said she would have given this sandwich at least 4 out of 5.) 3.5 out of 5

Red Baron Biscuit-Style Scrambles (Bacon)

Wednesday, November 18th, 2009

Red Baron Bacon Scramble - Ad

Red Baron Bacon Scramble

Looks: While the food on the box appears as a golden, flaky, biscuit covered in fluffy eggs and melted cheese, the real deal is closer to a molten Pac-Man dead-set on devouring you and anyone you care about. The crust singes around the edges, the cheese doesn’t melt evenly, and the bacon cooks much darker than pictured. 3.5 out of 5

Taste: Regardless of how it looks, this thing is delicious – it’s like deep-dish pizza had a baby with an Egg McMuffin, and they named it Scrambles. The cheese and bacon are great (of course), and although the egg doesn’t really make you think “hey, this tastes like eggs,” it doesn’t detract from the flavor. There’s also a creamy sauce underneath the toppings, and it is most likely made from magic pixie deliciousness dust. My only complaint is that the outer edge of the biscuit gets too hard during cooking. 4.5 out of 5