Archive for the ‘Pasta’ Category

Culinary Circle Five Cheese Lasagna

Wednesday, June 16th, 2010

Culinary Circle Five Cheese Lasagna - Ad

Culinary Circle Five Cheese Lasagna

Looks: The sauce doesn’t have the texture that’s depicted on the box – it’s closer to Ragu than Prego, if you know what I mean – and the lasagna didn’t quite keep its structure after being cut, even though I let it stand for the recommended 10 minutes after removing it from the oven. 4 out of 5

Taste: This lasagna tasted amazing for being boxed and covered with a thin plastic sheet, and it took literally no culinary ability to prepare, so even my wife could make it! I love my wife. The only change I would make to it would be to remove one of the five cheeses. Four is plenty, and by the end of my seventh piece, I was starting to feel a little logy. 4.5 out of 5

Healthy Choice Balsamic Garlic Chicken Cafe Steamer

Monday, May 17th, 2010

Healthy Choice Balsamic Garlic Chicken Cafe Steamer - Ad

Healthy Choice Balsamic Garlic Chicken Cafe Steamer

I stumbled upon an interesting discovery while eating this Healthy Choice Balsamic Garlic Chicken Cafe Steamer: all Healthy Choice meals are actually just different arrangements of the same chicken, noodles, and sauce. Take a look at some: #1, #2, #3, and #4. Healthy Choice has just packaged the same meal in many different boxes and then filled in the blanks in the name of the meal. In that spirit, here is my review of the Healthy Choice Balsamic Garlic Chicken Cafe Steamer; you can fill in the blanks yourself, or you can play along with a friend!

The Healthy Choice Balsamic Garlic Chicken Cafe Steamer tastes ___(adjective)___. There are definite hints of ___(noun)___ in each bite, and the ___(property)___ of the chicken is ___(adjective)___. I didn’t expect this meal to be so ___(adjective)___, but it surprised me and made me say to my wife, “Honey, this meal is so ___(adjective)___.” The vegetables were ___(adjective)___, but the pasta was predictably ___(adjective)___. Based on the picture on the box, it should have had more ___(noun)___, but the ___(noun)___ was close enough.

Fill out this Mad Lib in the comments, and the best one will win a special surprise. I’m not going to tell you what it is, but it definitely is not not a box of Strawberry Pop-tarts.

Lean Cuisine Linguine Carbonara

Wednesday, May 12th, 2010

Lean Cuisine Linguine Carbonara - Ad

Lean Cuisine Linguine Carbonara

“Hey boss – I’m packing up these Carbonaras, but we’re low on peas and bacon. Should I order more?” “Nah, just give ‘em four peas and two little bacon scraps. They’ll never notice.”

I’ve made carbonara myself from scratch; I’ve had it in Italian restaurants; I’ve even eaten it in Italy, where they tend to make pretty decent Italian food. While this (unsurprisingly) doesn’t come close to any of those three experiences, it’s a passable approximation for a frozen box that cooks in three minutes. The sauce has the trademark eggy/cheesy taste of a carbonara sauce, but it’s way too loose. The noodles are too soft too, making this more of a carbonara soup than the thick pile of cheesy pasta that it’s supposed to be.

Looks: 2.5 out of 5 Taste: 3 out of 5

Healthy Choice Chicken Margherita Cafe Steamer – Revisited

Tuesday, April 20th, 2010

Another revisitation of a reader submission:

Healthy Choice Chicken Margherita Cafe Steamer - Ad

Sydney’s picture:

Healthy Choice Chicken Margherita Cafe Steamer

My picture:

Healthy Choice Chicken Margherita Cafe Steamer

Looks: As it lacks the thick brown sauce pictured on the box and the long pieces of chicken with discernibly browned skin but white meat, I do believe that this box has seen a little photoshopping in its day. 3 out of 5

Taste: You may remember that Sydney called this bowl of food “the worst thing I have ever eaten.” I think it’s fair to say that I had a different experience. It’s certainly not the best thing I’ve ever eaten, but it’s a mildy pleasing combination of the noodles + chicken + sauce trio that comprises essentially every Healthy Choice meal out there. 3 out of 5